“…he had built up within himself a kind of sanctuary in which she throned among his secret thoughts and longings. Little by little it became the scene of his real life, of his only rational activities; thither he brought the books he read, the ideas and feelings which nourished him, his judgments and his visions. Outside it, in the scene of his actual life, he moved with a growing sense of unreality and insufficiency, blundering against familiar prejudices and traditional points of view as an absent-minded man goes on bumping into the furniture of his own room.” – Edith Wharton, The Age of Innocence
Posts Tagged ‘romance’
“He was not sure he wanted to see the Countess Olenska again; but ever since he had looked at her from the path above the bay he had wanted, irrationally and indescribably, to see the place she was living in, to follow the movements of her imagined figure as he had watched the real one in the summer-house. The longing was with him day and night, an incessant undefinable craving, like a sudden whim of a sick man for food or drink once tasted and long since forgotten.” – Edith Wharton, The Age of Innocence
“He simply felt that if he could carry away the vision of the spot of earth she walked on, and the way the sky and sea enclosed it, the rest of the world might seem less empty.” – Edith Wharton, The Age of Innocence
When the air begins to change in New York
from blistering cold to lukewarm
the way ice water pumped up, from beneath the dirt
hits your humidity drenched face
in Bangladesh on a summer morning
while beads of sweat cling from your back
and cats lie with legs outstretched on the veranda,
smoke and the smell of roti catching you, welcoming,
I stop waiting for the bus —
And stroll down cement sidewalks,
past frame houses with colorful shutters and small yards
under the shade of green ash,
the corner deli filled with students craving grease to stuff their faces
and sex, drooling
not paying attention to street lights
or stop signs
or school boys passing their rubber balls,
smiling to myself
filling the air with compliments
remembering conversations that never happened,
wishing they had.
– Shammy 3/20/13 4:33pm
I bought them in bulk to cheers and drink
With my mates from the states. My first adventure on my own
Through the streets of London,
where all the lights and things were
From a shop made for foreigners like me.
The banks of the Thames sprinkled with European couples
On one of their many holidays.
Overcast, with breakthroughs of light
Rain unannounced and gone before you run for cover,
That’s London for you.
Past the Tate Modern, munching on my broccoli and cheese pasty
Under the rows of trees there is a bench
And a lovely couple sat there,
Posing with one arm outstretched.
The belly of the Tower Bridge opens up to let the ship through.
Ships of goods, ships of money that won’t go to anyone who needs it.
The tube to Liverpool street in Old London
Where I meet you for a drink or two
At a hotel bar full of suits
Sparks flew and our nights turned into days
And back to Crawley we went
To your two bedroom apartment, with my flowers waiting for me
On the kitchen table.
– Shammy 7/29/12 5:26pm
And I spent two days laying in your sheets, unable to breathe, unable to speak, unable to smile but you caressed me and fed me and lay with me till I was better again. My mouth foul with bacteria but still you kissed my lips, held me to your heart and in the end I don’t think it was the medication or the ice cream, or the food you made for me, but it was your love, your touch, your attention that rid my heart and lungs of disease and brought me back to prosper by your side. – Shammy 10/22/12 5:05am
Went through our albums last night,
You were beautiful and I looked happy.
I miss you even now.
I get chills.
I miss the advice you gave, that I never took
And the way you looked when you wanted me.
I miss the three courses you would make
And the flowers I’d arranged on the dinner table.
I miss the foolishness after you came home from work,
And closing the blinds.
We had so many memories that didn’t include her,
Now I am making new memories
With new people, and it all seems so different.
Even I am different,
More aware of the dangers,
Venturing more carefully, double wrapped in armor.
How did I let my guard down with you before?
All you ever had to do was smile and I forgot everything.
– Shammy 7/11/12 4:43am